Computers

The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim.
- Edsger Dijkstra

Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
- Mitch Ratliffe

On the negative side, I've been getting charged for a ton of stuff I didn't order lately. On the positive side, I did win that 'Who's Got the Best Password' contest on AOL last week.
- Spike Donner

I can only imagine the deprivation and loneliness you will feel from a lack of human companionship when your 1000 free AOL hours run out.
- Nate B.

Morons. These people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless. They must think they're super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecure network. Unfortunately, the connection works both ways. Long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer.
- Mootar from bash.org

I went to a gentleman's cybercafe — and they offered me a 'laptop dance'.
- Anonymous

Crap... Someone knocked over my recycle bin... There's icons all over my desktop...
- billiam

You know you're a geek when... You try to shoo a fly away from the monitor with your cursor. That just happened to me. It was scary.
- Juuso Heimonen

We will never become a truly paper-less society until the Palm Pilot folks come out with WipeMe 1.0.
- Andy Pierson.

What does the Start button do — isn't the computer already running ?
- A Win95 user

'Intel Inside': The world's most widely used warning label.
- Jim Hopper

Software suppliers are trying to make their software packages more user-friendly... Their best approach, so far, has been to take all the old brochures, and stamp the words, 'user-friendly' on the cover.
- Bill Gates

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
- Ken Olson, president/founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.
- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943

I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year.
- The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957

The Internet is the end of civilizations, cultures, interests and ethics.
- Official Iraqi government statement.

Some things Man was never meant to know. For everything else, there's Google.
- Anonymous